Pissed Off

4am. Two more hours at work. Not a good time for me- I was tired, intermittently sleepy, easily scared, jittery from excessive amounts of caffeine, mentally not there (I guess my backup subconscious mechanism takes over when I'm in that state), and impatient.

No new patients. I sat down and tried to read my molec cell bio textbook. The lady in bed 8 caught my attention.

B*tch:"Excuse me sir"
Me:"May I help you?"
B:"What's going on?"
Me:"Excuse me (Huh? That question is really vague. Please approach me in a smarter manner.)"
B:"What's going on, Is my boyfriend gonna get admitted? How long are we gonna stay here? Howblah blah blah blah blah...blah?"
Me:"Let me talk to your nurse. I apologize-he's not my patient"

The nurse directed me to the doctor. Found out that we were waiting for the hospitalist to call back so we'd know if he needs to be admitted or not. I went back to bed 8.

Me:"So we are still waiting for another doctor to call back. We don't know if he needs to be admitted or not."
B:"So the doc is waiting for a second opinion?"
Me:"Uhhh...I don't think its that (You idiot. Our ER doc is not asking for a second opinion about your boyfriend's case- he wants to find out if the hospitalist wants him admitted. Intiendes?). We are just waiting for the other doctor's call to see what he wants to do (You have no clue. I am trying to tell you that the hospitalist will decide- not the ER doc. The ER doc makes the diagnosis and then he decides on a disposition. This is the disposition stage. This requires him to call on the hospitalist to make a disposition. Get it? I figured you won't. So I didn't bother saying all these.). So let's wait a bit more, okay?"
The Douchebag Boyfriend:"WHAT DO YOU KNOW? WHAT ARE YOU HERE?"
Me:"I am just a tech, sir. If you have any further questions about your disease and condition, I'd be more than glad to call your nurse (who doesn't want to talk to you...just like me)."
B and TDBBF:(They stared at me condescendingly)
Me:"Alrighty then (Screw you. And you. Don't talk to me.)".

And as I stepped outside, I heard giggling followed by clusters of words that are indicative of backstabbing and mockery. They were pretty good at it. That moment awake me more than my red bull did.

"OKAY YOU MOTHERF*CKERS! PAYBACK TIIIIIIME! ENJOY THIS (I SPLASHED 5 GALLONS OF PURE METHANOL ON THEIR BED AND I LIT IT WITH MY FLAMETHROWER...I FOLLOWED THE ASSAULT WITH AN M-16 AND I DROPPED AN ATOMIC BOMB)! YOU CAN GO TO HELL!!!"

Okay, that was impossible. This is what really happened:

"Okay. (My head hung low as I walked out and just sat down, pretending to not have heard anything and just buried my head in my textbook... I cried. Just kidding. I didn't give a crap.) Whatever. All in a day's work."

Less than two hours later, I was walking out the hospital double doors with a huge smile. It's time to go home.